Well, the winning ticket decided to send in their answers with a sincere apology on their lateness.
1. Why is America the greatest?
Who could best a country where a guy like Richard Heidrich could rise up and become a top political pundit in a first-class, urban research University? Plus, we have Chuck Norris contained within our fine borders…
RH: You forgot about the Nuge.
2. How will you represent people whose ideology differs from yours?
I won’t… Just kidding.
But, seriously, I promise nothing less than my absolute best in reaching out to students, regardless of their ideology or other identification. At the end of the day, I will have been elected to be the leader of all the students – and I will make sure that each of them knows that both myself and the student government are looking out for them.
RH: Spineless, huh?
3. What salary are you offering me to be your press secretary?
Well, Richard – I gotta win this thing first. But, due to the wildly successful blog you operate here, know you will be first on the list of qualified applicants I consider. As an aside, the position will be called “Public Relations Director” and will be required to send weekly news-updates to the student body – think you’re up for it?
RH: Come on Tyler, ole Grove Stove's got this one in the bag for you. I'm not sure what you mean by "list of qualified applicants," unless you just plan on having my name repeated over and over again. Once I have this position it will not have such a wimpy name, but something more like "Truth Master" or "Straight Jiver." You will also refer to me as "His Jiveness, Richard Heidrich." This is all non-negotiable. Get back to me on that salary (benefits?).
4. How will you keep gay marriage off campus?
Sorry to disappoint you, Richard – I’m not going to do that. Please don’t be mad at me…
RH: Refer to comments on Question #2.
5. How has the liberal elite media (UWM Post) been treating you?
Did anyone else notice that the font size used this week (in the print edition of the UWM POST) in my editorial was smaller than that of my opponent? ‘Nuff said.
RH: I didn't notice actually. I tore as many copies of Burseth's editorial out of every UWM Post I could find and used them as toilet paper.
6. Who would you bring to Pantherfest 2009?
DMB opening for Phish, of course.
RH: This man knows how to pander!
7. Sound off. What do you want to leave PTJers thinking about?
It has been a great week, reaching out to students with my “straight-jive rhetoric”. At the end of the day, I hope that my hard work and strong record of the past two years shows students that I have the ability to lead the best year of SA - ever.
RH: YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!
RH Wango Tango!
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